Our Fatness DOES Define Us

4 min readNov 6, 2019

Shannon Ashley is right

Shannon, in her latest article, wrote that she fears that people will define her by her weight (which she bravely notes in the article) and not who she really is, a mother and a writer.

Although I weigh a bit less (185 this morning), I’ve been fat most of my life and I understand her feelings.

It’s the age -old idea of “first impressions” that hits us. When we first meet someone, we “judge” them by what we see. And it takes time to learn who that person really is — really is: intelligent, non-racist, reader. animal-lover (all things I require in a friend/lover).

Our appearance also defines how we “see” ourselves. Who do we see when we look in a mirror. Do I see “Mitzi” aging gracefully, someone who was successful in a career she didn’t want, has minor success as a writer, and who raised an intelligent, loving woman? Or do I see the little girl, young girl, teenager, young woman who’s been overweight since she was 8 years old?

How others “see” sometimes affects how we see ourselves…

Let’s begin with people who help to instill the incorrect image over many years:

When I was a little girl, our family lived above my father’s barbershop. Whenever, that “little” girl would walk into the shop, one of Pop’s barbers would say…




A 70+ year old retired RN who’s following her 60 year old dream of being a writer, one interested in everything unusual. www.facebook.com/MitziFlyteAuthor